Bobservation No. 115: Legislation and Quotations

Anticipated Legislation
The recent failure of most, if not all, of the water companies to prevent unacceptable amounts of sewage being regularly discharged into rivers, lakes and the beaches of Britain have caused the Government, so I am given to understand, to bring about imposing legislation to force these companies to drastically improve their performance in these areas. I am told that funding will fall 50% on the companies and 50% on their customers. Accordingly water companies will be restricted to declaring dividends of 0.01% maximum and water rate charges will have to increase substantially. To achieve this increase there will be three main areas that will bear the brunt. These will be private houses with swimming pools, saunas and garden hoses. The proposed charges will be £10,000 p.a. for swimming polls, £9,000 for saunas and £2,000 for garden hoses. As well as this the proposed legislation will enable HMRC to increase these amounts by however much is necessary to achieve cleanliness in our rivers, lakes and beaches. It is thought unlikely that anyone will object to such socially acceptable legislation. 1/4/24

Quotations Group
Meeting on Monday mornings at 11am in Fulking village hall, the Quotations group is a chance for discussion for adult villagers and ex-villagers in friendly surroundings. Very ably lead by Samantha Leader a subject is chosen by mutual agreement and discussed the following week. A voluntary donation of £1 each week covers tea and Samantha’s marvellous shortbread. Quotations relevant to the chosen subject are invited and are collated and printed out each Monday to be read out at the meeting. This is an informal get together and a very good way to meet other local residents.

South Downs News, December issue

The SDNPA has discovered that celebrities can be used to plant trees. They have managed to plant one tree so far but, if another 7,999 celebrities step forward, they will be able to meet their quota for this winter. At least 8,500 celebrities will also be needed next year. No word on any fees payable. Chief Executive Trevor Beattie reports that the government has committed £257m for cycling and walking in 2021-22, perhaps because government policy has ensured that, for most of the population, cycling and walking will be the only transport options they can afford in that year. You can also read about the Community Infrastructure Levy, a fund set up by the SDNPA to accept and administer bungs paid by developers. The Park’s Volunteer Development Officer reports that voluntary activity has largely ceased due to the immense health risks that the Park poses to volunteers. However, despite the danger, one such volunteer did manage to write an informative little column on ivy. There’s also a page on nitrates in the aquifers that features quotes from David Ellin (Paythorne, Perching) and Roly Puzey (Saddlescombe). No mention of glyphosate, however. Despite the government’s ongoing armageddon against small business, the Park has split £40,000 between 27 petitioners “following a rigorous and impartial selection process”. The accompanying photo shows two ladies in a food shop, neither of whom is wearing a mask. Perhaps their Maundy money needs to be retracted. There’s an interesting column on Tide Mills, home to the Black Kite, the European Bee-Eater and the Short Eared Owl. And there is a page of poems by some of those temporarily released from detention. Finally, two pages of suggested walks that you can only do if you happen to live near the route (the SDNPA frowns on the use of the automobile).